2014

This was draft in January 2014 actually.
Was planned to write this in January as welcoming the 2014 but then I kept postponing it...
haha... that just me... keep postponing things. a bad habit that I really need to fix it to be a better person.

As I'm writing this, it's already 4th of February now.
Time flies so fast.
I barely hang onto something as in I felt that I didnt do much during the time that has fly by.
During the new year, I let out my feelings to my supervisor...
on how I really think that the job I'm doing now is really not for me...
after I have a heart to heart to her and be all honest to her, I kinda have this huge burden lift up from me.
Felt so relieved in some sorta way...

During that time, I keep pray and I read a lot of things on improving myself as a muslim first.
I think that's the most important thing I have to do now.
Luckily, during the time I try to find myself, the novel that I read, Ya Maulana, has helped me a lot during that time.
I put my goal in to improving myself as a muslim and to find His love and redha.
That's my goal.
After that, day by day my heart become more light.
I see things more positive now.
From doesnt have any goal or point of living, I finally found one.

At the same time, I try to accept the current job I do.
Although deep down, I still think it's not really what I like to do.
It's not.
Since I try to be more truthful to myself also this year (one of my goal for this year), I admit, the job I did now, is not what I really like.
I know that I like writing etc. things with arts but I just dont have the courage or real determination to do it.
so, I decided to just stick what I'm doing now and start to do the things that I interested as a part time.
tho current job I have, the pay is quite good for the graduate like me.
Opportunity that I have now probably what others are looking for.
I promise to myself that I need to do 3 days of Istikharah.
I only managed to do once before.
Until I did a fully 3 days of Istikhkarah in a rows, and firm with my decision later with His guidance, then only I'll make up a decision.

I used to say to myself that my goal of wanting this job is to learn so in the mean time, I'll just have to learn a lot.
that's my only goal.

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Last 26th January 2014, AJL28 was held.
as usual, me and my sisters are watching in front of the tv.
This show used to be our family annual show that we always watched together.
Things have changed since then.
But the thing that I want to tell here is how Ziana Zain left a lot of impact to me at that night.
Her performance just left me speechless.
Suddenly I just, wow!
I love her so freaking much!
Well, I started to like her since I watched her in Maria Mariana back in 1996.
She just strike to me the coolest kakak/unnie at that time.
It's not only her that coming back from my childhood days.
At the office, my company subscribed this Astro On Demand TVB Drama which the actress was someone that I knew from my childhood also.
Maybe in 1998.
She's Joyce Tang Lai Ming.
These 2... made me miss so much of my childhood and the 90s.

I used to say this before. I'm an History person. A nostalgic person.
some people they like to wonder or to see how the future will be mold etc etc etc.
But for me, I like the past.
My wonder was always, how the people live in the past?
the economy at that time, the political environment, the entertainment etc etc etc.
I curious about those more.

Back to Ziana Zain, after that AJL performance, I started to search for her songs and everything.
I end up downloaded her songs.
Cant find the full albums so I've to download one by one of the song.
Convert from YT to mp3 etc.
Then transfer them to my mp3 and my phone.
During shower, I also sing to her XD
that's how I'm into her these days.
All because of her AJL performance.
I definitely like her for a reason.
After that, I found out that she, Erra and Awie will perform a Konsert Teaterikal at Istana Budaya.
Straight away I purchased the tickets and asked my mum to join me (since I still cant drive on road yet :P tho I already have license XD )
I asked my sis to follow also. since she still have her part time job pay in the bank ^_^
InsyaAllah, I'll be going to see them this 8th March 2014.
want to reminiscing my memory of the 90s.

Tho I was born in the 90, but the 90s really so precious to me.
the music, the feeling, the vibe etc.
I like it more than now.
Well they said, we gotta appreciate what we have now since we'll going to miss it .
I guess I have to appreciate what I have now also.
Maybe in another 10 years, I'll miss what I have now also.
Wallahualam.

Okay, that conclude my post for tonight.
Tho I promise to keep updating this blog, InsyaAllah, I'll continue to update this.
InsyaAllah.
Goodnight :)))

4th February 2013 2:25:06am
-nuramirah liyana-

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