아프고 힘들더라도 이것도 살아있어야 느끼는거니까 - 순정에 반하다

Thursday, October 30, 2014


Today.... really feel exhausted after following my mum to here and there...
After 30 days quitting from my job, today it totally draining out my energy...
However, somehow... I think i just shouldnt or dont have the right to actually complained or talked about it because if I'm exhausted then my mum who's the one that driving and half plus of my age must be much much much more exhausted...
So cant really say anything...
I just have to endure it.
My sister also require something from me....
Which make me feel so guilty if i didnt do it...
So... my last resort is... 꼭 참아...
넌 할수있어... 이젠 끝까지야돼...

Saturday, October 25, 2014

[REVIEW][MANHWA] Love Is In The Mask

Today I finished a manhwa that I started to read last 2 days. It was so good that it just made me to finished it all.
this is my first time reading this manhwa (a korean manga). my first time that i actually finished all of the chapters.
the plot just strike me to finish it all.
Hyunbin lead a really sad life.
it's really good that despite of all that she's actually loved by lots of people and despite there are still lots of people that taking advantage of her as well...
tho personally the ending looks quite rush so...
it's definitely not boring hehe
The messages that it being potray was quite god as well
The message of LIFE. People that take life for granted and people the took life so preciously.
It's sad and it just engraved in me.
It have it's happiness also...
The life of Seo Hyunbin, Lee Yoonha, Chun Birak, Ja Chiho, Tae Gahyun and even Yun Yaeha. These characters in this manhwa really teach me a lot. My first finished manhwa, Love In The Mask, 가면속의 사랑. :)

Thursday, September 18, 2014

New Beginning

New beginning...
I'm going to leave the company that I'm currently working...
This 30th September going to be my last...
I decided to help my mum with her business...

Tho sometimes I do feels the uncertainty... but somehow deep inside me, I want to walk that route...
that uncertainty route just to see what it can offer me...
that road or route may probably be full of thorns, glasses or things that will hurt and harm me...
However, my feeling is so strong asking me to still walk there...

InshaAllah this route may show me other great things that this world can offer me...
only He knows anyway, so I belief in that...
He knows best...
Allah will lead the way...

I want to learn other things... InshaAllah, He'll let me learn...
May He make me strong during this learning process...
InshaAllah :)

Sunday, August 3, 2014

[REVIEW][MOVIE] Cloud Atlas (2012)

It has been awhile I didnt wrote a review on a movie.
last time was my March post.
these days I finally can catching up some movies and it really fun :)
most of the time, I'm just too lazy to write one but I guess not this time.
I'm so eager to write on Cloud Atlas since it still quite fresh in my mind for like 10 minutes now XD

I'm a big sci-fi movies fan.
At first I was thinking to watch Everywhen (2013) movie but then I just made a decision to watch Cloud Atlas instead cause I've downloaded this movie for quite sometime but still not watching it yet.
Okay some synopsis on this movie from imdb,

Sunday, July 13, 2014

July 2014 Post, Ramadhan 1435H

Dah lama x update sini... perasaan nak update mmg ada tp tu la... malas pun ada, semua ada la...
ada jer bende yg menghalang nye >.<
Sekarang tgh ada feel nak menulis, tu la yg menulis ni...

first skali nak citer. I already broke the news to my supervisor... like yep, this is definitely my decision that I'm going to take.
InshaAllah after solat istikharah yg telah dibuat, perasaan lebih berat kepada teruskan.. and somehow, ianya lebih jelas dari sebelum ini...
Alhamdulillah... dan harapnya Allah permudahkan segala - galanya...
Walaupun tadi ayah ada juga cakap yg he prefer for me to kerja dgn orang lg... because I already have degree...
bila bincang balik dgn my sister td, dia pun cakap, "apa-apa pun, ni hidup kau... kau yg kena buat keputusan yg mana kau rasa terbaik untuk kau. ayah punye perspektif, sbb kau dah hbs duit belajar semua, so he prefer you to get a monthly wages... stable... tp kalau kau ada bende lain nak buat, ko kene prove kat diorg la yg ko blh buat... tu je.. "
Apa yg dia cakap tu betul... the best way now, aku kene PROVE kan my decision going to make me a better person and gain good things for me and my family... of course...
aku dah malas nak berat-beratkan fikiran aku dah...
nak buat... x nak x yah buat... tu je...
hidup kalalu nak fikirkan kebaikan untuk semua orang susah jgk...
InshaAllah, He knows best... mungkin ada hikmah di sebalik keputusan aku ini...
be it a good thing or bad thing will come, aku hanya perlu jd lebih positif dalam menghadapinya...
InshaAllah... :)

Okay, stop on that, hari ni dah masuk Ramadhan yg ke-16. dah separuh bulan dah lalui Ramadhan ni...
1st half ramadhan ada gak tinggal2 tarawih... InshaAllah, goals untuk 2nd half supaya dapat lengkapkan tarawih and bacaan Al-Quran aku... InshaAllah...

Sunday, March 30, 2014

[REVIEW][MOVIE] Hot Young Bloods 피끓는 청춘

So I just finished watching this movie just now.
since it's still fresh, felt like want to write something about it now.
this is the synopsis of the movie from wikipedia

Friday, March 28, 2014


I really have a problem...
잘 모르는 문제.... 그런가?
what i want in me?
how to make what i want be real?
lack of passion on everything except entertainment things...
i think that's me..
lack of concentration...

i really think that i'm the one that my own life hard...
working with someone, the guidelines are theirs and never yours...
even tho you do have what you want to do, 네 맘데로 못해...
항상 다른 사람 길은 따라해야지
만약에 this is what you want to do, 그냥 해...
근데 그거는 못해...
왜 못해?
that's cause you decide you cant right?
사실 the more people say cant, the more you want it right?
그런 인간이야...
인간 인생이 왜 이렇게 복잡해?
나만 인생인까?

항상 싫어 싫어하다가..
아직도 아무것도 been done...

you have like practically 3 days before 1 year with them...
day by day...
it feels like anytime... it can be your time to be 잘랐어...
항상 불한했어...
is my time will go?
no matter how good you are, how talented you are...
you're just a worker...
넌 boss 아니잖아...

Thursday, March 27, 2014

[REVIEW] [MOVIE]: Sembilu & Sembilu II

Since we still in March and I'm in a mood of writing so not going to postponed again, I decided to write tonight.
Got a few of Review posts that I planned to write actually. 
so going to start with this post first. 
I'll be writing this in Malay (a bit rojak la hehe :D )  instead since it's a bout Malay movies :) 


Sunday, March 9, 2014

Konsert Teaterikal Suara Kita, 8th of March 2014

It's 4:56 am right now.
Cant sleep.
Still feeling the concert hype ;D
I want to write this down since it still practically fresh in my mind right now.

Friday, February 28, 2014

Last day of February 2014

So today is 28th February 2014
Alhamdulillah, I've been let by Him to live until this end of February :)

well, this post gonna be another rant about myself on things that revolve around me.
work... life... thoughts...

As I'm writing this post, I'm still listening to Hunger Games OST.
well, still in Hunger Games withdrawal syndrome :P

I opened my email just now.
work email.
I used to tell myself before. If ever I'll working later, I should separate my work and private life.
Once I'm at home, you shouldn't touch your work stuff.
well, reality strike me.
you have to bother it no matter what.
so I opened my work email.
yeah, a BUG in omega/production.
something that I already tested and already passed it.
since I'm the tester who passed it, so the responsibility is/was on me.
It just shown I'm not doing a good job of it.

it's haunting me back.
when I think I'm strong enough, then, it's haunting again.
why do I keep feeling this?

sure, that bug, I can tested it again tomorrow but I cant help myself to keep thinking about it.
I felt exhausted...

Saturday, February 22, 2014

[REVIEW] [BOOK]: The Hunger Games Trilogy Book

So I bought The Hunger Games Trilogy book set and it arrived at my house on 5th February 2014.

Then my book reading journey of this trilogy begins and last night or was it today, 22nd of February 2014, I finished all three books.  So it took me all 17 days to finish all 3 books. well since most of the time I read this book is when during my way to work and got back from work, in the train and bus. 
These books has accompany me for all these 17 days.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Weekends: Saturday & Sunday (8th & 9th February 2014)

Last Saturday, I was wake up quite early lol
usually weekends it's hard for me to wake up early :P
well, I woke up early cause I had an early sleep the night before.
Do my 1-week laundry :P
then, reading my Hunger Games book the 1st book. since I just bought the books :)
was planning to go karaoke actually.
with my mum went to Klang with my grandpa here and there, my plan was postponing until 2pm.
After Zohor.

After my mum got back from Klang, me and my 2 younger sisters are ready to go already.
we went to Plaza Alam Sentral's K-Bintang Karaoke place.
before that, we went to buy the cloth for making our this year Baju Raya.
Buy some cloths at Nagoya. cause us about 100++
it's okay... it's for Raya anyway. it was still on sales too..
my mum bought hers, my 2 younger sisters and I paid for my another sisters.
the cloths are quite pretty too :)

Then, after that we went to the karaoke place.
I paid for 1 and half hours.
I belted 6 Ziana Zain songs to lepas gian lol
the songs are Anggapanmu, Kemelut Dimuara Kasih, Putus Terpaksa, Kekal, Mimpimu Bukan Mimpiku and Sangkar Cinta.
My mum and sis also singing some songs.
was singing until sore throat XD
well, since it's a Ziana Zain song lol

at night, my dad bring us to the restaurant near to our house to makan2
it's to celebrate his own birthday actually
well, it has been awhile we have a dinner outside together as a whole family.
It's nice to have it :))

on Sunday, after accompany my mum to send her sandwiches to the client place, we went to Cash Converters at Seksyen 9.
First time, went there.
wow make me so excited to explore the place :D
so many khazanah/2nd-hand/cheap items :P

we bought few cheap2 stuffs XD
actually I was thinking of searching a vcr player.
was thinking to convert our VHS tapes to digital video
but seems like the place didnt have the VCR player.

later we went inside Plaza Masalam and bought lunch for people at home at Giant since my dad went to Kajang to my grandparents house and my Shah Alam's grandparents went to a relative house so my sis definitely not going to cook and the answer for the lunch is going to be outside food :P
Coincidentally, we met with Nash.
he was a 80s Rock Group vocalist called Lefthanded
well, we already know that he lives in Shah Alam as he's my youngest sister's YDP PIBG.
but to meet him in person.. wow!
what a coincidence :D

then I went to look around in Speedy...
well my mission is to search for Ziana Zain album...
my mum was like, "Apa yang ko nak cari ni?"
"Nak cari album Ziana Zain sebenarnyer :P"
"Kan boleh download jer lagu2 dia -__-"
well, when I like an artist, I tried to buy their album...
well it's a token of helping them anyway :D
then, I found the album, Aku Cintakan Mu - Ziana Zain.
the only ZZ's album that left there.
Since I cant found the others, it's okayla.. I just took this.
it's her 5th album and the last album in 2001.
at least I got one of her album hehehe :)

This is the album:

then we went back home and on the way back home
coincidentally, we met with Selangor's ex-mb or the politician, Tan Sri Muhammad Muhammad Taib. 
we were actually coincidentally looked at the escalator and saw him 
and my mum was like
"ha.. kenal x tu sapa?"
"jap.. tu yg mat taib mat taib tu kan? ex-mb selangor"
"ye la tu. ramai betul kita jumpa org2 terkenal hari ni"
"yer la weekend"
"betulla tu. nash td kita nmpk dia bawa anak2 dia tp mat taib sorg2 jer la pulak hehe" 

we just laugh it out and walk to the car and went straight back home :) 

I kinda feel happy with my last weekends :) 
May every weekdays and weekends ahead will be happy like this InsyaAllah :) 

Tuesday, February 4, 2014


This was draft in January 2014 actually.
Was planned to write this in January as welcoming the 2014 but then I kept postponing it...
haha... that just me... keep postponing things. a bad habit that I really need to fix it to be a better person.

As I'm writing this, it's already 4th of February now.
Time flies so fast.
I barely hang onto something as in I felt that I didnt do much during the time that has fly by.
During the new year, I let out my feelings to my supervisor...
on how I really think that the job I'm doing now is really not for me...
after I have a heart to heart to her and be all honest to her, I kinda have this huge burden lift up from me.
Felt so relieved in some sorta way...

During that time, I keep pray and I read a lot of things on improving myself as a muslim first.
I think that's the most important thing I have to do now.
Luckily, during the time I try to find myself, the novel that I read, Ya Maulana, has helped me a lot during that time.
I put my goal in to improving myself as a muslim and to find His love and redha.
That's my goal.
After that, day by day my heart become more light.
I see things more positive now.
From doesnt have any goal or point of living, I finally found one.

At the same time, I try to accept the current job I do.
Although deep down, I still think it's not really what I like to do.
It's not.
Since I try to be more truthful to myself also this year (one of my goal for this year), I admit, the job I did now, is not what I really like.
I know that I like writing etc. things with arts but I just dont have the courage or real determination to do it.
so, I decided to just stick what I'm doing now and start to do the things that I interested as a part time.
tho current job I have, the pay is quite good for the graduate like me.
Opportunity that I have now probably what others are looking for.
I promise to myself that I need to do 3 days of Istikharah.
I only managed to do once before.
Until I did a fully 3 days of Istikhkarah in a rows, and firm with my decision later with His guidance, then only I'll make up a decision.

I used to say to myself that my goal of wanting this job is to learn so in the mean time, I'll just have to learn a lot.
that's my only goal.


Last 26th January 2014, AJL28 was held.
as usual, me and my sisters are watching in front of the tv.
This show used to be our family annual show that we always watched together.
Things have changed since then.
But the thing that I want to tell here is how Ziana Zain left a lot of impact to me at that night.
Her performance just left me speechless.
Suddenly I just, wow!
I love her so freaking much!
Well, I started to like her since I watched her in Maria Mariana back in 1996.
She just strike to me the coolest kakak/unnie at that time.
It's not only her that coming back from my childhood days.
At the office, my company subscribed this Astro On Demand TVB Drama which the actress was someone that I knew from my childhood also.
Maybe in 1998.
She's Joyce Tang Lai Ming.
These 2... made me miss so much of my childhood and the 90s.

I used to say this before. I'm an History person. A nostalgic person.
some people they like to wonder or to see how the future will be mold etc etc etc.
But for me, I like the past.
My wonder was always, how the people live in the past?
the economy at that time, the political environment, the entertainment etc etc etc.
I curious about those more.

Back to Ziana Zain, after that AJL performance, I started to search for her songs and everything.
I end up downloaded her songs.
Cant find the full albums so I've to download one by one of the song.
Convert from YT to mp3 etc.
Then transfer them to my mp3 and my phone.
During shower, I also sing to her XD
that's how I'm into her these days.
All because of her AJL performance.
I definitely like her for a reason.
After that, I found out that she, Erra and Awie will perform a Konsert Teaterikal at Istana Budaya.
Straight away I purchased the tickets and asked my mum to join me (since I still cant drive on road yet :P tho I already have license XD )
I asked my sis to follow also. since she still have her part time job pay in the bank ^_^
InsyaAllah, I'll be going to see them this 8th March 2014.
want to reminiscing my memory of the 90s.

Tho I was born in the 90, but the 90s really so precious to me.
the music, the feeling, the vibe etc.
I like it more than now.
Well they said, we gotta appreciate what we have now since we'll going to miss it .
I guess I have to appreciate what I have now also.
Maybe in another 10 years, I'll miss what I have now also.

Okay, that conclude my post for tonight.
Tho I promise to keep updating this blog, InsyaAllah, I'll continue to update this.
Goodnight :)))

4th February 2013 2:25:06am
-nuramirah liyana-